


Distraction

by IRegretNothingAndEverything



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: High School, Megamind fuckin taking down a bitch, Sexism, and his has spikes on them!, cursing, he's upsetti because for some reason some girl's shoulders are more distracting than his, high school megamind, how is that not more distracting!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-06
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2020-02-27 10:47:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18737491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IRegretNothingAndEverything/pseuds/IRegretNothingAndEverything
Summary: How could her outfit possibly be more distracting than his!





	Distraction

“You’ll need to go home, your outfit is distracting other students.” Megamind lifted his head from his assignment, looking over towards the desk where the teacher was talking to a student. He looked over the outfit in question, in what he hoped was a simply analytical way-god knows he’d gotten punched far too many times for ‘checking out’ someone’s girlfriend-but found… nothing wrong with it. Black sweat pant, a tank top with a jacket to cover, she mustve been in a hurry that morning, normally she’s pretty well dress-Megamind back on task here-… how in the hell was that distracting.

“Sir I don’t-” He blocked them out for a second and looked down at himself quickly, confirming he had worn his villain outfit that day. Platform boots, skin tight leather, a cape, he had spikes on his shoulders, the collar, everything seemed to be in order with that so... why the hell? How is she more distracting?

“You’re distracting other students. You need to leave-”

“Okay, no, what the hell. How is the fuck is that more distracting than this.” Megamind stood, cape fluttering behind him. He gestured towards it. “Case in point! Cape!” 

“That language-” Megamind cut him off quickly 

“Will not be tolerated, blah blah blah, I know, I don’t care, back to my question. When I walk in a quiet classroom, I physically cannot stop myself from stomping with these fucking things on, how the hell is she, with no offense meant to you, more distracting than me? Sweat pants and a jacket? Is that what’s distracting here? I thought the spiked shoulders would do it, but honestly.” 

“She’ll distract others-” He waved a hand, cutting the teacher off once more. 

“Yeah, yeah, sure, whatever, I wasn’t distracted until you started talking about it, I see nothing wrong with the outfit, but you’re still avoiding the question, how is that outfit.” He gestured towards her a moment. “More distracting than this?” He gestured towards himself. “She’s... she’s in baggy clothing that all but hides her! I am in skin tight leather, how in the hell is she more distracting?” He was actually upset. He worked hard on designing this outfit, Minion worked hard to make it, this was complete and utter bullshit. 

“Well... she’s going to distract other students.” 

“She’s been sitting in the corner quietly until you called her out, yes I noticed that, I notice everything.” He paused, frowning, moving over to them, leaning forwards a bit. “Answer the fucking question. How is she more distracting than I am?” 

The teacher stared a moment. “Well... look at her!” He declared, titling his head up like a petulant child. Megamind rolled his eyes, turning to look over her again. 

“Sweat pants, tank top, jacket. Mhm... has not changed in the past three minutes, so I’m gonna say it’s the same as before I interrupted this... Soooo what’s wrong with that?” He turned, narrowing his eyes at him. 

“Well... tank tops are not allowed! They show too much skin.” 

Megamind glanced back at her again, frowning. “Isn’t... that the purpose for the jacket? I mean... it covers what the tank top didn’t, so...” he looked back to the teacher, eye brows raised. “And I’m pretty sure the temperature in here is four hundred degrees Celsius, and I’m in skin tight leather, overheating like a pig in a desert, and you’re... upset she took off her jacket?” he leaned back. “Well that’s fucking stupid. Not our fault you keep this room so hot.” 

The teacher actually seemed surprised he was siding with the student, before standing, frowning. “Doesn’t matter. She needs to cover up.” 

“You make it sound like she’s dressing like a whore. She’s wearing sweat pants, everything that needs to be covered is covered... Honestly, by those standards, mine is still more scandalous than hers. Skin tight, don’t forget that. Besides... Isn’t it a little creepy to see a, what, sixteen year old, and immediately think on how inappropriate her outfit is, even if she’s completely covered, when you’re, what, sixty? That’s creepy as hell, you know.” He crossed his arms over his chest, frowning at the now sputtering teacher. He glanced back at the girl, smiling. 

“You might wanna go sit down. Any second now he’s gonna call security on me.” He heard the phone being lifted, the teacher start talking again. “I hate for you to be caught in the crossfire of this.” She stared a moment, before nodding, moving back to her seat quietly, smiling to herself. 

Megamind turned back to the teacher, leaning forwards a bit, leaning close to him, making sure the man had no where to back up to. “Pull that shit again, try to pretend that it’s about how distracting a person’s outfit is.” he shifted, pushing his cape to the side to reveal his de-gun, and grinned, eyes manic. “Just don’t, how about that.” 

He pulled back, shaking his head. “Besides. Next time you wanna dress code someone for being distracting, try to make sure there isn’t an aspiring villain sitting a few seats away in full costume, honestly. Basic common sense.”


End file.
